implement of torture

implementotorture
Originally uploaded by atlbiscuit.

oh.. get your mind out of the gutter....
this is my new toy...
do it yourself traction...
apparently when I fell a couple weeks ago I knocked something out of whack in my neck.. so this past week when both of my arms were a little numb and I was having a hard time picking things up with one of them, well.. I got it checked out.. so after some xrays it was determined that I jammed the area where the brachial plexus (sp?) nerve runs out of your neck and down both your arms.. which explains the trouble..
So today after PT.. I come home with this contraption.. it's empty at the moment.. but soon that bag you see will be filled with 8 lbs of water.. I will attach myself to it around my head and sit in a chair and get stretched for 15 minutes at a time..
looks like fun don't it!?
It's more than a little frustrating.. but at least we caught it early before there was major damage..
I was told to use it for "medicinal purposes only" which cracked me up cause what else am I gonna use it for? a cat toy? though they seem intrigued by it..
It's all good though.. I get frustrated sometimes cause even though i'm "fixed" I seem to be having small isues here and there that cause me to get a little depressed and think. "ok what's next?"
If I was a horse.. they would have taken me out and shot me....
But I know that there are people out ther in worse shape than me.. I often think about my cousin and how she battled breast cancer for 7 years and I wonder how she did it.. She kept her sense of humor and I imagine that though she didn't talk about it much she had to be depressed.. but she always said.. "whatcha gonna do.. you just keep going." So on some level I feel like I shouldn't get down, or be upset or cry.. but then I remember that it's ok.. and that pain is relative.. and chronic pain is something that I hope none of you ever have to deal with..
I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy..
I'm gonna be 40 this year.. and some days I feel like I am 90.. but in my head and my heart I will always be 18..
so here I go.. keepin on keepin on.. tomorrow I will hook myself up to this contraption and watch the news for a while.. and then unhook and remind myself that it could be worse.....
Perhaps I am having a bit of a poor pitiful me night.. but it's not how I am generally..
I really just wanted to share the photo.. but couldn't really without an explaination or some folks were gonna think i was a real big freak!
so.. happy thursday.. it's almost the weekend..
and GO BOSOX!