special assistance........ aka the lowes story

welcome friends and neighbors!
I haven't quite gotten my ire up enough to write about that stooopid law initiative in Alabama.. but don't fret.. I will..
in place of that today I offer up the following fare.. Some of us were having a pseudo discussion about how perhaps people in our lives don't like being mentioned in our blogs.. I can understand that.. I try to only use initials, so that the guilty will know who they are.. but aren't readily identifiable..
So in the interest of letting everyone know that I am not beyond the embarrassing story.. I give you.. THE LOWES STORY...
some of you have heard it.. it may not transfer well.. but here goes...
after a debilitating back injury I began pain management treatments with a local doc.. every so often, they would change the meds so that my body didn't get too used to one for an extended period of time.. After a visit and med change, I decided to wait until the weekend to try it out.. since sometimes they make me sleepy..
So, bright and early saturday I took them.. waited a while.. and felt ok.. so off to Lowes we went.. now anyone that knows me knows that lowes is my favorite place to shop besides target.. As we get to the store.. I start feeling a little.. silly..
goofy really.. we wandered through the store.. everything was "pretty" in that kinda have a buzz going on kinda way.. we ended up with a cartful of new flowers for my garden.. Butter at this point I think realized that I should probably lie down.. so we headed off to the registers.. as she was checking out.. I wandered over to the magazine rack to look at all of the "pretty" pictures.. I was pretty gorked out at this point.. she called me over and I did the meds shuffle over to the register.. as I was standing there waiting for her to finish up.. I heard one of the lowes employees over the loudspeaker say "special assistance is needed in plumbing" .
Now in my state, in my head, I thought for some reason that this was the most hysterical thing I had ever heard. so in my head I started saying it..
and then it happened..
as I was saying "special assistance is needed in plumbing" over and over again in my head.. for some reason.. I changed the words..
"SPECIAL ASSISTANCE IS NEEDED IN MY PANTS!"
from the fog in which I was mired, I heard butter scream BABY!!!
yup.. you guessed it..
it was my "out loud voice"
you know.. the one that everyone around you can hear? The woman at the register apparently didn't hear me but heard butter shout.. so she asked "what did she say"?
and I was fully prepared and just about to blurt it out again.. and fortunately.. she stopped me.
now.. you gotta understand.. there was no reason for me to say it.. my pants were fine.. thank you very much.. but in my warped little head.. it was funny..
and if you knew me you would also understand that as much of a cut-up as I am, it's not something that I woulf generally say.. out loud.. in front of well.. other people..
It remains to this day, a most embarrasing.. and quite funny little story..
every once in a while I will just say it just for fun.
So, in that, not afraid to tell stories about my own self.. there ya go..
never go shopping at lowes on new medication. :)
And after a fabulous interaction with my neurosurgeon back in september, I am happy to report that the back problem has been fixed, and I am well on the way to recovery.. I'll be shopping for new flowers for the garden again real soon!